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Tags: - C4D - Vray
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My first Vray render with Depth of Field + Lens Distortion
I rather screwed up the glass ball, looks more like a bubble

:-)



Adding DOF slowed it down a ton, fortunately you can bake out the GI and play with the DOF separately.



+ Caustics... looks messed up.. hmm what have I done wrong


Uhm... I got no idea

Vray seems to have some weird bug where it gets stuck sometimes on the initial light cache and never finishes, just eats up all the ram. Very annoying.

I've swapped the ball for uhm.. a glass turd (A cone with a twirl deformer)
These renders all on the medium preset, so a bit course but they are rendering in like 10 minutes so can't complain.


And from another angle:









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I'm not exactly in the seasonal spirit this year, it has to be said

'There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child'

humbug!

Just did my Christmas shopping, checked out the iPhone and the new iMac in the flesh, gotta be said the new iMac is amazing, most gorgeous thing ever. I'm always amazed at how apple finds a way to constantly refine what I keep thinking couldn't get any better.

Swarms of... uhm ethnic minorities in hoodies hurding round the iPhones. I'm not racist i've always said I hate everybody equally, but my god, every single one of them stunk. Stereotypes exist for a reason and It's almost like wearing a hoodie is becoming a personal statement about your hygiene now.. at least it was in this Apple Store.

I had to leave in the end it was assaulting my senses.


--

The manual for Adobe Flex is terrible, you basically have to already know what your doing for it to make any sense. It's like reading a legal document most of the time at best, and at worst like a riddle or an iq test.

I can't get basic things to work because the examples are all incomplete or don't work, not helped by the fact this is beta and the stuff online is talking about beta version 2 and I\'m using v3

None of the examples seems to work as is, they are missing things or don't explain how to tie them up into a working example. It expects you to already know how to glue them in and what they are doing.

So I'm basically going to have to read and learn the whole manual/program in order to complete any one example.

*sarcastically claps*

I learn by examples, I get something that does what I want and then I pick it apart to find out how it works by systematically breaking it

:-)



reverse engineer really. Some of the examples are just overly complex and do 100 things to demonstrate 1 simple thing making it impossible to reverse engineer, added to the fact the thing doesn't even work to begin with.

All I'm trying to do is change the native menu items... 3 hours I spent on it and got nothing. I'm not that stupid.




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I was talking with my mate a week ago about what a pure intelliegnce would be, and we basially came to the conclusion that it wouldnt think anything, because there is no need to

And any giant human like intelligence, should it exist, would basically be depressed as it would know everythinig and that would make it miserable, it would also have no real motivation of It's own, I thought this before I saw Hitchikers Guide, but they pegged it brilliantly:

Marvin: I think you ought to know I'm feeling very depressed.
Trillian: Well, we have something that may take your mind off it.
Marvin: It won't work, I have an exceptionally large mind.
Trillian: Yeah, we know.

Also touched on the concept of personal accountability

Ultimately no one is responsible for there own actions as It's all a product of something else happening prior

These bizarre human concepts fall completely apart when taken out of the narrow band of existence that we experience.

They only help describe the immediate reality we experience, which of course exists only in our own head.

A make believe world of reason/purpose

Ultimately I keep coming back to the same kind of conclusion, and It's not a unique one by far

We only do things we want to do

Reason and purpose exist only in your mind, and ONLY to your own mind

This basically means anything you do, you do for your own reason... anything.

It's not physically possible to do things for someone elses reason, unless they implanted something in your head.






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Tags: - Apple
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Steve Jobs at Home in 1982
"This was a very typical time. I was single. All you needed was a cup of tea, a light, and your stereo, you know, and that's what I had." -- Steve Jobs


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Life.. bleh

I'm down, emotionally drained, physically tired and It's bloody COLD... no I\'m not a big fan of Winter anymore, not this winter. It doesn't even bring seasonal snow anymore, It's just cold and wet.

I'm trying to work out whats broken... with me

Broken is a strong word, I'm far from dysfunctional, I'm in no serious dilemma, but there are numerous things id like to be different in my life, things that are not where id like them to be.

Take the concept of a fat person trying to diet to loose weight, or someone fixing a boat with a hole in it by inventing a better bucket, both are equally stupid if the cause isn't cured first. Emptying the boat of water is lots of hard work that goes on forever and requires constant attention, plug the hole is more difficult but ultimately solves the problem and then emptying the boat of water is extremely easy. Still with my boat analogy?

1 or 2 problems can cause a multitude of problems further down the line in any complex system

Most people spend time trying to plug the holes or bandaid a wound. They expect the bandaid to heal the wound, when all the bandaid is meant to do It's protect the wound while your own body heals itself.

You have 2 basic choices if your not happy with the way things / you are. Fix the underling dysfunction and be succesfull/happy and all the rest as a result or, find a way to be happy with what you have now, the old happiness is wanting what you have not having what you want.

And the keyword as always is BALANCE, nothing is black or white, least of all when dealing with people.

The biggest thing that's eating away at me lately is the lack of energy, physical, motivational... any kind of energy.

So I need energy, so for that I need good sleep pattern, for that I need reason to live and get up in the morning, an exercise routine, good diet...
If I can't get those basics pegged i'll be stuck going round in circles.

Energy is a strange thing, say I feel the need to tinker with something that's not important, I can spend hours on that late into night past hunger and tiredness
But if instead It's some work I need to do... all of a sudden.... no energy!

The ability to work on things you don't want to do, a good work ethic, self discipline.. all that jazz. But It's far more complex than that, you cannot strong-arm yourself into enjoying what your doing and feeling truly motivated, making yourself a good self slave isn't a solution either. Not if you want to be happy and successful at the same time.

Fitness you want to be fit, genuinely motivated to change, anxious to improve yourself whether it be for fitness/longetivity/energy levels or physical appearance sake. But when it comes down to actually exercising you can't hold that motivation for the actual workout. You just see lots of work for 30 minutes in order to loose a gram of fat.. to gain a microscopic granule of fitness.

Thinking of it like that, thinking of anything like that in the immediate future, makes it very un-inspirational. Work for small gain is dull even if the work is little.

I think people who can see the big picture ALL the time, are the succesful ones.

It's rather contradicting, meditation/bhuddism etc is all about being in the moment

happyness = being in the moment

success = being future minded

oh no! It's back to BALANCE!

*ties things together*

You cannot get motivated to do something okay or well, you can only get motivational energy to do things amazing and beyond hard (at least for me)
Things that will bring great benefits, they can motivate you as they require all your resources to attack and your mind knows that and releases this motivation to attack the task.

However if that big wonderful task is made up of 100's of smaller tasks, and you break it down as such, you won't get the motivation when attempting each of the smaller tasks. The gain will seem to small on It's own.

Lets work out for 30 min to loose 1 gram of fat.... doesn't work, doesn't motivate.

So you have to find a way to keep the big picture in mind at all times and then feed off that. get motivation from working towards something great, knowing you'll get there if you do these small tasks, no question, you WILL get there, you can't go backwards and stay still if your doing SOMETHING, it adds up. But It's hard to conceptualize that and keep it a reality.

So to tie it all up, instead of bailing water out of your boat by improving your bucket, find what's the real source of the problem, what everything stems from.

You can't do things you don't want to do, even slaves are not doing things they don't want to do strictly, they do it because they'd rather not die or rather not be punished. Unless your some kind of robot there always a reason for doing something, the more compelling the reason, the more motivated you're going to be. If It's to avoid pain and suffering, to make other people happy, It's not going to be particularly motivational or healthy.

--

Don't do things to avoid the bad, do things to go after the good.

When people are faced with a car accident scenario, where they suddenly have to avoid a tree, a person, another car in order to get to safety, most people fixate on the thing they must at all costs avoid.

You know what happens?

They plough straight into whatever they wanted to avoid.

All that's in your head is the object your fixating on, If you think 'I must avoid this or failure will happen' your mind will go hard to work at informing you about all the possible ways you could fail, It's doing It's job.

If you ask your mind how to avoid failure, it will tell you all the ways you can fail... and you will fail, you will fail because your brain will have been so busy on how to avoid failure, imagining ways in which you could fail in order to avoid such situations, it won't have spent any time on how to succeed.. so you won't know, you won't have an idea how to.

So Instead, ask how can I succeed. Where do I want to go. Fixate not on the car ahead you want to avoid, but the open space you want to target, and your mind will steer you correctly. It will feed you all the possible ways you could succeed, all the paths that will take you to safety.

END RANT


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